My Poor Confused Diary
by The Amazing Mailbox Villain
Summary: Sora's got a new diary and he's a bit confused as what to do with it.


Diary Entry 1

Dear Diary,

Wait....what am I suppose to say for a diary anyway? I've never had one of these....you...before. Am I allowed to talk to it? Should I talk to you like a person? But you're just a book. Oh, who cares, it's my diary. You can just deal with it. I'll just....go with the flow I guess.

So, diary...

Maybe I can't do this after all. It feels like such an invasion of my own privacy. I mean, I know i'm the one writing it and all but what if someone else reads this!? What if someone finds out about my secrets!?!?! Haha, who am I kidding. No one's going to read this. Ah, i'm going crazy again it seems...

I'll just hide this under my seat just in case. No wait, what if we turn? It'll fall out and everyone will see it. No chair then. I got it! I'll hide it in the Gummy ship's cargo space! No one ever goes in there. Perfect!

Alright diary, let's try this one more time. Phew. Calm down Sora, it's just a blank page! I think I should see if I can get some anxiety pills or something. This is just ridiculous....ANYWAY!

I've been having these weird thoughts lately. Like....is kairi's hair color real....or not?

Seriously, there is no way anyone's born with hair that bright. Video game or not, that hair is FAKE. Really now, what's wrong with her? Does she cosplay or something? She must really like Reno because she looks just like him. I feel bad for Reno, he looks just like a girl. I guess kairi's just living proof. Him or Gaara, but she doesn't look like a raccoon so I'm going to have to stay with reno on this one.

I've been having the same problem with Riku's hair. I hope he dyes it. I'd feel really bad for him if his hair was naturally grey. He says it's silver but I know he's just embarrassed to admit he looks like an 80 year old woman.

Or Xemnas.

Poor guy. I wonder how bad you have to be at styling hair to get it to turn out that color? I mean, I tried to dye my own hair once. It didn't go so well. I tried going blonde but everyone called me Roxas. Can you believe that? I, diary, am NOT gay. Needless to say, my hair has now been reverted back to it's natural brown. Stupid Axel...

Today has been especially rough. I don't know what it is with everyone's hair but it's been on my mind a lot lately for some reason. Like today, when I was getting rid of some heartless, just minding my own business, Marlxia poofed out of nowhere!

[you know, with his black smoke and cheap sound effects]

So, since I was already questioning Kairi's hair color I decided to ask him about his hair. I mean come on diary, a man with pink hair? That's just silly. But when I asked him about it he got all defensive and started waving his arms around wildly. He was saying something too but I was too busy noticing how much he looked like a retarded flamingo flailing around like that to take any notice. I just couldn't help myself. It really was very funny diary. I'll have to draw you a picture sometime.

Great....I just promised my diary I would draw it a picture.....I should really just stop this before I end up marrying it or something....

Continuing on with my story, as he was freaking out I just kept staring at him. I couldn't believe how dumb he looked. haha. And mind you, the jumping up and down only made his hair look even more feminine. With all those hair flips he was doing you'd think he was trying to be on America's Next top model. Gosh. Finally, I just gave up on trying to find out whether his hair was natural or not and I simply walked away. Although,he did manage to shout

"THE CARPET MATCHES THE DRAPES"

I still don't know why he was talking about his drapes. We were no were near the topic of fabric or furniture. Heck, he didn't even mention the word carpet during his rant. Maybe he just remodeled his house? Or maybe he just moved and he was really excited about it? It was so random diary. I have no idea where that man is coming from. He's really wierd.

There are still many things in this world unknown to me diary....

Wow, that really did get a lot of my chest didn't it? It seems like a I made it through my first diary entry in one piece. Just to make sure though I think I'll add a lock on it so goofy doesn't go blabbing it to everyone like last time. Kairi still looks at me funny after finding out about my secret fort in the tree outside her window.

What? The tree was really big and I needed to build a fort big enough for me and Riku. It's not my fault it was directly in front of her bedroom window. It was all just a strange coincidence. Besides, it's not like she has anything to hide.

oops...

Oh diary, I think I really like you. You listen to me and you don't make any weird faces or walk away from me when I tell you stories. You don't cry or laugh at me either. You don't even threaten to kill me, it's great! Not to mention you don't call me a faggot when ever I try to talk about my feelings. I still don't get why people do that...

Thanks for listening diary! Maybe i'll have an answer as to whether or not Marluxia and kairi's hair is real or not. I really hope I can figure out why Marluxia was shouting about drapes too....He's just a little too strange. What idiot shouts about drapes and carpets? I fear we may never know diary. Never.

[NOTE! I love Marluxia and am no way bashing him. OR kairi/ Riku/ Xemnas for that matter. I just made this out of boredom so be nice ok?????? Thank you!]


End file.
